Showing posts with label my name is lizzy. Show all posts

Frost at Midnight // Lake Moraine


"Frost at Midnight," by Samuel Taylor Coleridge—one of my very favorite poems in all of life and literature. Life imitates art, or at least it did for me, at Lake Moraine, with these last two stanzas running through my mind, as I walked in awe 'round the perimeter of these glassy waters in Banff National Park, Alberta. The full text of the poem is below (via Poetry Foundation).

. . . . 

Frost at Midnight

The Frost performs its secret ministry,
Unhelped by any wind. The owlet's cry
Came loud—and hark, again! loud as before.
The inmates of my cottage, all at rest,
Have left me to that solitude, which suits
Abstruser musings: save that at my side
My cradled infant slumbers peacefully.
'Tis calm indeed! so calm, that it disturbs
And vexes meditation with its strange
And extreme silentness. Sea, hill, and wood,
This populous village! Sea, and hill, and wood,
With all the numberless goings-on of life,
Inaudible as dreams! the thin blue flame
Lies on my low-burnt fire, and quivers not;
Only that film, which fluttered on the grate,

Still flutters there, the sole unquiet thing.
Methinks, its motion in this hush of nature
Gives it dim sympathies with me who live,
Making it a companionable form,
Whose puny flaps and freaks the idling Spirit
By its own moods interprets, every where
Echo or mirror seeking of itself,
And makes a toy of Thought.

                      But O! how oft,
How oft, at school, with most believing mind,
Presageful, have I gazed upon the bars,
To watch that fluttering stranger ! and as oft
With unclosed lids, already had I dreamt
Of my sweet birth-place, and the old church-tower,
Whose bells, the poor man's only music, rang
From morn to evening, all the hot Fair-day,
So sweetly, that they stirred and haunted me
With a wild pleasure, falling on mine ear
Most like articulate sounds of things to come!
So gazed I, till the soothing things, I dreamt,
Lulled me to sleep, and sleep prolonged my dreams!
And so I brooded all the following morn,
Awed by the stern preceptor's face, mine eye
Fixed with mock study on my swimming book:
Save if the door half opened, and I snatched
A hasty glance, and still my heart leaped up,
For still I hoped to see the stranger's face,
Townsman, or aunt, or sister more beloved,
My play-mate when we both were clothed alike!

         Dear Babe, that sleepest cradled by my side,
Whose gentle breathings, heard in this deep calm,
Fill up the intersperséd vacancies
And momentary pauses of the thought!
My babe so beautiful! it thrills my heart
With tender gladness, thus to look at thee,
And think that thou shalt learn far other lore,
And in far other scenes! For I was reared
In the great city, pent 'mid cloisters dim,
And saw nought lovely but the sky and stars.
But thou, my babe! shalt wander like a breeze
By lakes and sandy shores, beneath the crags
Of ancient mountain, and beneath the clouds,
Which image in their bulk both lakes and shores
And mountain crags: so shalt thou see and hear
The lovely shapes and sounds intelligible
Of that eternal language, which thy God
Utters, who from eternity doth teach
Himself in all, and all things in himself.
Great universal Teacher! he shall mould
Thy spirit, and by giving make it ask.

         Therefore all seasons shall be sweet to thee,
Whether the summer clothe the general earth
With greenness, or the redbreast sit and sing
Betwixt the tufts of snow on the bare branch
Of mossy apple-tree, while the night-thatch
Smokes in the sun-thaw; whether the eave-drops fall
Heard only in the trances of the blast,
Or if the secret ministry of frost
Shall hang them up in silent icicles,
Quietly shining to the quiet Moon.


dispatches from the garden state: a photo essay


There are very few people who truly appreciate what I mean when I tell them I am from the Garden State.

Just now, writing that, I am suddenly feeling very nostalgic for my graphic tee from dELiA*s that bore a cute illustration and caption: "the Garden State: it grows on you!" (have just now returned from an internet rabbit hole of teen fashion research because apparently dELiA*s met an early demise but they have since made a comeback—although they certainly seemed alive and well when I shopped there as a teenager in the twenty-aughts!)

All this to say, I get as many blank stares when I say I grew up amongst forests and farmlands as I dole out when someone replies to my introductory pleasantries with a "New Joy-sey" (for the record: I do not know one! single! soul! who pronounces it such and is actually from the state; the people who say this are always New Yorkers/from Staten Island!!!).

Shocking, I know (particularly when witticisms like this abound in popular culture. Those jokes only apply to Newark)—but I grew up in a truly beautiful part of the state: south Jersey with its greenery and glorious produce. A couple summers ago (2017, to be precise), I was home for a visit to my parents and extended family, and I realized that I had a deep longing to capture the New Jersey I know and love in photographs. During my visit, my mom obliged me with many roadside stops (or in some cases,  simply slow-downs) so I could try and capture these familiar scenes of my upbringing.

Even these photos and this small photo essay do not truly do my homeland justice. To be perfectly honest, my dream is to spend a month in June or July back home, with nothing else to do but drive back roads (which are all of them) and stop at every tiny roadside farm stand, documenting this singular wonderful tradition. The notion of a proper 'farmers market' (booths and stalls and crowds and the like) was unknownst to me until I encountered them in Union Square in NYC and likewise in other big cities; where I grew up, you just stopped at the farm on your way home from wherever you had been coming or going. My family has our tried-and-true favorites (Mood's, Schober's, Grasso Girls), mostly out of convenience of the routes we frequented, but many more whose names and locations I could not possibly recall, because of their glorious plentitude.

Although I've spent nearly all my adulthood in Utah (college + post-college), I will always be a Jersey girl at heart—it is where I was raised and home of the worldview that shaped so much of who I am. A favorite story to illustrate this point: when I planned a week-long camping trip in the Canadian Rockies, I had planned out our menu in advance to simplify our grocery stop for produce before entering the park (having brought the dry goods with us). At a Walmart in Edmonton, Alberta, I asked my friend Laura how many ears of corn she wanted. She gave me a strange look and replied, "one." A few days later, I started a pot of water to boil over our campfire and we shucked the corn cobs. Because I had planned and orchestrated all of this, Laura and our fellow camper and friend Angie looked to me for direction on what other prep they could help with. I explained that the prep was done, as I dropped our four-total ears of corn into the pot to cook. Laura's exclamation and dawning realization still make me laugh to this day: "When you asked me how many ears of corn I wanted, I didn't know that corn was THE ENTREE!" I kid you not that it had honestly never occurred to me that corn wouldn't be the entrée, comprising most of a classic summer meal. When I told my parents this story, we all had a good laugh, and I expressed that my gastronomic-homesickness for Jersey sweet corn will likely never ever dissipate. I usually find all other corn to be insipid, grainy, and altogether disappointing in comparison to the corn of my childhood. It may simply be that I find the produce of my home state altogether superior in every way. I am probably not wrong—we are named for it, after all.

Anecdotes aside, I hope this post makes you smile and gives you a small glimpse into the landscapes and foods that feel like home to me.

fun fact: Hammonton blueberries (of HAMMONTON, NEW JERSEY—BLUEBERRY CAPITAL OF THE WORLD and home to the annual blueberry fest) will always be my favorite blueberries. Some of our dear family friends lived in Hammonton when I was growing up and I was always jealous of/loved their blueberry shirts, with the Top Crop top-hatted-cane-wielding blueberry mascot. 

Every summer, my dad would buy several flats of blueberries, which we'd rinse and then store in our basement chest freezer. All winter long, we'd have fresh-frozen blueberries for our Honey Bunches of Oats with almonds (or other cereal of choice). <3 Dare I say, fresh frozen blueberries are far superior to their freezer-aisle counterparts.

"NO NASTY PEOPLE"—this is so dead-on South Jersey and I love it.

LOPES. need I say more.


New Jersey, I love you forever. But especially in the summertime.

love languages: a list

a few of my love languages:

• mother nature's colors.
• the visible, incremental growth of my houseplants.
• the best compliment i have ever received, from un bel cameriere romano: "i tuoi verbi sono perfetti." (he could tell instantly that I had spent several years studying italian because '[my] verbs [were] perfect' and I used il congiuntivo with ease)
• whenever the sky or mountains are pink.
• making a new friend as an adult and introvert and when I'm least expecting it.
• starting a new book and knowing immediately that I'm going to love it.
• when my clothing fits well and is well-made and feels like an extension of me, rather than an appendage to me (I do believe there is a difference).
• when a dog is happy to see me.
• nicely weighted and textured paper.
• when I immediately recognize a dear friend's handwriting on a piece of mail or note.

this list will be continued, to be sure.

THE PANTS OF MY DREAMS


Please know how much I love these pants (gorman x monika forsberg) and how close I came to purchasing them, but they are just too expensive (then factor in international shipping). I simply could not justify that expense on a frivolous purchase. 

In lieu of a frivolous purchase, let's just admire together how darling these are and acknowledge the fact that at 8 years old when I was starting French horn lessons, I would have died over these.



patron saint of dogs • pt. i

My dear friend Allison named me godmother of her teddy bear (aka miniature goldendoodle) puppy Buckwheat way back in July 2016 AND YET THERE EXISTS NOT A SINGLE PHOTO OF SAID DOG ON THIS HERE BLOG.

In my love for small furry animals, I have earned myself the nickname "Patron Saint of Dogs," so without further ado, an obscene number of photos which serve as proof of the aforesaid. I think they are hilarious for their sheer quantity.

PSA: Harmon's Grocers have the most darling dog treats.

Asking Buckwheat what movie she wants to watch at the Columbine Lake cabin

holding Buckwheat like a tiny baby

laps are made for sitting.

DOG OR MUPPET

DOG OR TEDDY BEAR

DOG OR GOOFY SMILING TEDDY BEAR MUPPET

puppy emoji irl

Buckwheat is probably actually a cat because she has a penchant for perching on unlikely surfaces and has mad hops to jump up to them.

one of these things is not like the other.

when Buckwheat was tiny, on a roadtrip she climbed up on my shoulders like a mink stole and it was weird and hilarious and the best.

Buckwheat loves socks.

not a real dog, tbh

Giving bb buckwheat the last few drops of Martinelli's after Thanksgiving dinner. lol whoops

sitting is hard

Buckwheat clambered atop my knees to avoid the cold snowy wet sidewalk. A CAT I TELL YOU.

pretty pretty princess.

One time I let Buckwheat drink the last dregs of a glass of water and in doing so I created a monster because whenever I am drinking anything from a glass or a water bottle, Buckwheat sidles right up to me and watches like a hawk.

sitting is hard, pt. ii

drinking glasses, pt. 785

MATCHING SOCKS

sitting is hard, pt. iii

A REAL-LIFE TEDDY BEAR

a real-life muppet

back when Lauren was Buckwheat's dogwalker, we had lots of fun.

back when Lauren was Buckwheat's dogwalker, we had lots of fun, pt. ii

FATEFUL INAUGURATION DAY

SETTLERS OF CATAN

MUPPETS LOVE HIKING

MUPPETS LOVE STALKING

MUPPETS LOVE BEIN' MUPPETS

Buckwheat has a tell when she is scared, which is that she puts on her tough gruff bark and sits on your feet. Now you know.

sleepyhead.

If you made it this far, I hope you will have the chance to meet bb Buckwheat in real life, as she is the best weirdest fluffiest goofiest dog.